It's been an hour I only stared at my laptop's screen before I actually start writting this post. Staring empty, tried to think but I don't even know what I was trying to think. Just a few hours ago, somebody broke my heart. Somehow that person reminds me how it feels like to be broken hearted. Ironically, a few months ago that person reminded me how it feels like to like someone. To feel happy and excited when somebody call you. Feelings that I already completely forgot.
That person didn't know that that he actually just broke my heart. And again it's my fault because I was thinking too much and too long before I finally decided that I'm going to tell him that I like him and I thought he like me too. But a few hours ago he told me (because we're friends) that he already had someone, they just start going out. It makes me feel sad. I should've listened to what John Mayer told us : "Say what you need to say! .. better to say too much than never to say what you need to say!..". Dammiitt!! T_T If only I could turn back time but what's done is done.
I just realise that broken heart can actually make your entire system disable. Alright not entirely but most of your system, like what I just did, stared at the laptop's screen for an hour, trying to think but can think. It's like I have a brain damage or something *touch wood*. Ooo, I think it can make you become fat as well, cause everytime I start to think, I always end up thinking about doughnuts. T_T Haaahh, I hate this kind of feeling. Helpless, don't know what to do, always stare empty at something without even realising it.
My friend told me to keep going. I mean, don't step back and stay to my decission of telling him that I like him. But what if his gf find out? I don't want to have an armed jealous girl chasing me around and ready to stab me whenever she sees me. But in the other hand, maybe I would be able to move on faster after I released all those feeling by telling him the truth. I just need to ask him to keep this as a secret from his gf? nice idea, ay?
Aaaarrhhh, confused. What should I do guys?? I'm just gonna take a walk and think. I hope I would be able to think and find the answer. Haaahhh, staring outside the window again. Why the world is still so beautiful even when my heart is broken? I better grab some more ice cream.
Note : Yea, I know John! I should've listened to you.. (My friend kept singing John Mayer's Say in the next room... T_T)
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